missing a hanger

number one suspect: mila.

they are individually wrapped in foil

do you know what is a real classy candy? york peppermint patties. our candy bowl is full of them right now.

p.s. was full of them. now is less full.

I CANNOT HEAR YOU BECAUSE THE CHRISTMAS MUSIC IS TOO LOUD

WHERE CAN I FIND A CHRISTMAS TREE I NEED ONE STAT.

so healthy

just got some blood work back. my cholesterol is amazing. SO AMAZING.

p.s. pounded back some raw scallops with the fish monger at the market this morning. almost as amazing as my blood work. MAYBE EVEN MORE AMAZING.

acts through which mila slept during the met's live in hd production of aida

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proselytizing on pork

said EV, may 2007: undercooked pork is the new cooked pork.

says bon appetit this month: undercooked pork is the new cooked pork.

the world would save a lot of time if it just read my blog, really. cut out the middle man. trim the fat, if you will. unless it is pork belly, in which case leave the fat on and proceed to (under)cook it.

p.s. saw 'bride wars' a few days ago (please do not even ask) and one of the brides was part of the 'international butter club' for a brief while. a new stick of butter every month in the mail. sounds amazing, no? a few more brilliant ideas like that and the movie might have crept above the 12% rating it currently enjoys on rotten tomatoes.

p.p.s. obviously pork belly deserves a long and luxurious cook time, that was just a joke. but seriously, a nice pink tenderloin? perfection.

back from boston

saw joanthan adler. he was hanging out at his store telling the staff where to put the enamel menorahs.

also discovered a new way to chop pillows - the side chop. like the usual top chop but it's a bi-chop, and you attack from the lateral aspects rather than the superior. an interesting look, to be certain. needless to say I will be giving it a trial at EV HQ.

new goal

how sweet would it be to have such a smoking house that you could have picture frames hanging askew and people would assume it was intentional?

jesus christ, mila!

mila has lost it. she is out of control. it is the first of november and I caught her playing christmas music today. even I have the decency to wait until after american thanksgiving. and also she tried to go buy christmas decorations for her new pine sapling (please do not even ask because that is a whole other blog) but mercifully the store was closed.

low-impact athletics

so our building has a gym (p.s. I have never gone there) but it also has a lounge area outside the gym so I guess if I was ever feeling particularly athletic I could don a moisture-wicking tracksuit and hit the lounge with some magazines and a bottle of gatorade. and also probably a lacoste sweatband.

p.p.s. UPS failed to deliver a lamp today as planned. I am thinking a lawsuit is probably in order.

rapport record

guess who is already on a first name basis with the owner of the stationery store that just opened three days ago?

cutting costs

thoroughly ashamed by the fact that my haircuts now cost most than mila's, I think I will try the local topcuts. review to follow.

p.s. what is wrong with me? since when do I care that I am higher maintenance than mila?

glug glug glug

guess who just bought egg nog?!

also, to the lady in front of me at the checkout: you had to pay when you got to the front of the line? who knew!? no worries, it wasn't like I was in a rush to get home and drink my nog or anything, so please do not even worry that it took you a million hours to dig through your voluminous knockoff vuitton in search of a wallet.

finally p.s. I was at walmart (do not even ask) and I am pretty sure that walmarts contain the highest density of poor parenting of any location on earth. one more family of overweight parents screaming across the store at their out of control, ill-groomed children as they careen into displays of sham-wows and halloween candy superpacks and I am pretty sure the entire chain will collapse into a black hole of family dysfunction.

financial ruin

after embarking on a plan to retrofit all the light switches in our apartment with screwless faceplates (who knew you could spend so much money on light switches? this is the last time I show mila the bill from home depot, that is for sure) and with the pending opening of a fine stationery store in our building, I am soon going to need a serious bailout.

bo-town

is boston actually called that? anyway, we are going there in november. reservations have been made at a japanese restaurant which research tells me is one of the most Important restaurants in the northeast. mila was not so keen on vast quantities of overpriced raw fish, and did not seem to care how Important the place is. so I fed her some story about how they blowtorch some of the fish and that is pretty much cooking; not clear on whether she bought this, but reservations were made in any event (it is, after all, an Important restaurant).

p.s. I already told mila she is not allowed to ditch me for dinner because it is pretty much our honeymoon. secretly I think it would be the perfect venue for a solo dine but I think I will keep that to myself (honeymoon, and all). have I blogged before about solo dining? if not I should, because it is a pretty fantastic practice.

brrrr

I think I need some bespoke gloves.

some questions

according to the globe and mail, our hospital boss is one of canada's top employers. they cite reasons such as "a nap room for employees who need a break during the day." question: where is this nap room? because I frequently would enjoy a nap during the day and yet somehow they did not mention this nap room during our orientation. also often while I am sleeping at the hospital (at night, I might add) things happen which disturb my sleep such as my pager beeping - perhaps they should have docked the hospital a few points for that? and oddly the quality of the linens did not seem to be addressed in the survey. if their research team had only scoured the EV archives, it would have been quite obvious to them that the quality of life at the hospital had ample room for improvement.

p.s. "a variety of flexible work options, including variable scheduling, telecommuting" was also mentioned, and yet my bosses seem to keep insisting that I come in to work every day. perhaps I will make tuesday a "variable scheduling day" and enjoy the benefits of an extra-long long weekend.

peace out

I think obama just jumped the shark. or maybe the nobel prize did, not sure.

shout-out xxv

this weekend found me on pei, droppin' my g's like nobody's business. I was probably a few days away from buying a farm or a pickup or something. I am going to have an east coast accent so soon I am not even joking.

btw one is on pei, not in pei. good to know.

also btw mila has finally joined me on this side of a quarter century.

recent events

lamp arrived; failed to find kraft singles at the gourmet grocery store across the street; got married; discovered pear guava salad dressing; et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.