it is like jesus was just here and made bread out of fish, or whatever it is he does. I was certain we were completely out of carbs (other than some lemon cream cookies, but I had already had a lot today and needed some variety) but then I found a box of onion and rosemary crackers in the cupboard. I am sure they were not there before because I would have eaten them.
I have a strong urge to liveblog something. I wish they would let us bring computers to our practical exam tonight, because I would liveblog it for sure:
7:00 pm - patient has 'chest pain'. start on my list of questions that I have been learning these past few days.
7:02 pm - I have run out of questions to ask this patient. perhaps they would like to discuss lamps.
7:03 pm - patient does not want to discuss lamps.
7:04 pm - patient does not seem interested in the relative merits of german vs. japanese steel. I am very interested, however, so I continue.
7:06 pm - I refer the patient to EV. patient does not write the web address down, but they seem like they have a good memory so they will probably remember the address and become a loyal reader.
7:07 pm - I ask the proctoring physician if she would like to read my blog as well and she does not respond, but I know that she is just following instructions not to chat with students so I tell her the address anyway.
maybe I will just make written notes during the exam. I know we are not supposed to take papers around the exam, but when I explain to the supervisors that I am simply doing some offline liveblogging I am sure they will understand.
I think that in my future homes, I will require that all lamps be controllable both locally, at the light itself, and also at an appropriately located wall switch. both locations will of course allow for dimming, as well as perhaps a preset or two. so far I have not found any way to wire a lamp such that it can operate in concert with a wall switch in a 3-way manner, but surely I am not the first person to require this modicum of lighting control flexibility. I will continue to investigate the matter.
well it is officially my blogiversary today. I assume the presents will arrive later this evening, which is fine, no rush. no ready-to-wear, please. also large gifts should be delivered to the rear door of the building, just fyi.
anyway, this inaugural year has seen 50 mentions of cheese, 48 chefs, 34 chocolates, 28 shirts, 20 foies, 16 collars, 13 sweaters and 10 blazers grace the pages of EV. meanwhile, class was mentioned 9 times and lecture, 8, so I guess it is not so surprising that I am really not all that well versed in leukemias at the moment.
p.s. I guess it is not so vain around here after all: 179 mentions of mila to only 41 simons.
it is 11:35 and really it is past my bedtime, but I shall brave out the next 25 minutes in order to properly ring in my blogiversary.
in the interest of reading the entire internet, I perused the hell's kitchen website. some observations:
gordon I love that your occupation is "world class chef."
jen you are a pastry chef. they barely do any pastry on HK. what were you thinking? is your savoury side up to snuff? doubtful.
aaron you are a retirement home chef, and let's be honest, you look kind of funny. you will probably get made fun of a lot by gordo.
brad you look cocky and I like that. where did your neck go though? maybe the mandarin collar on your chef's jacket isn't the best choice for you.
rock you are an executive chef which sounds impressive but your name is a mineral.
vinnie you look so surly I'll bet you are going to give chef ramsay a lot of tude. but you are also a "nightclub chef", so he will probably give you a lot back.
I predict joanna, brad and josh for the final three. you heard it here first.
who uses those wooden honey sticks? they are on every cereal box that is even remotely connected to honey. I see them for sale sometimes, but honestly, who buys a wooden honey dripper? what is even so great about them? gordon ramsay once shared a little tip with me - heat up the spoon before dipping it, then the honey slides right off - and that is good enough for me. GORDON RAMSAY WHEN DOES HELL'S KITCHEN START AGAIN? I CANNOT WAIT TO HEAR YOUR GLORIOUSLY FOUL MOUTH.
okay I checked the internet. it starts monday june 4th. GORDO I HAVE EXAMS THEN YOU GOOF. oh well I will watch anyway.
okay, I did not really understand before why sick people did not eat so much. I mean, just eat some food, right? maybe you are not super hungry, but that is okay, just choke back a powershake, they are actually delicious.
but now having had some personal experience, I can fully empathize. I have a killer cankersore in my mouth and it really hurts to eat. so mila has been trying to bulk me up on applesauce and yogurt and soup and stuff, but that is really not going to work. I mean, my diet is pretty much just dry carbs. and they hurt so much to eat. so I manage to choke back a cookie or two for breakfast, and maybe a little baggie of crackers for morning snack, but that's it. so I can see if this goes on much longer I am going to get some serious caloric debt. I will probably have to switch to powershakes, because as I say they are pretty delicious. it is really too bad that one of those shakes counts as a meal, because nothing finishes off an actual meal like an ice cold powershake.
you may recall that miss universe was one of many lowlights of last summer's tv viewing schedule. well, for some reason the donald has pushed his beauty pageant up a few weeks, and so it will be falling right in the middle of exams. mila seemed quite disappointed that she would probably have to miss it. (however, recent news that sweden, a miss universe powerhouse, has dropped out of the competition surely softened the blow somewhat.)
anyway, in amongst ads for miss universe was a riveting trailer for america's got talent. I cannot believe I am going to watch this garbage. somehow they managed to make it even more lowbrow than before, with the addition of the trashylicious duo of jerry springer and sharon osbourne. but most importantly of all? not to worry, the hoff is back.
my blogiversary is in like 4 days or something. but not to worry, there is still a solid shopping weekend left.
while leafing through the latest CMAJ, I saw a case report of a woman who got a lung infection from doing situps. well thank goodness I have been on situp hiatus for a few weeks now, because they sound dangerous. I am going to have to read this article in detail, as my current fitness routine is in serious limbo at the moment, to say the least.
all this pork talk reminded me: the globe said this morning that pork doesn't have tapeworm anymore. so why have I been cooking my pork to well-done all this time?
chicken, you are next. this whole fully-cooked chicken business is such a 20th century construct.
says june 2007's toronto life: "console yourself over summer's fourth wedding invitation" with a pair of $450 etro heels. what, was some socialite crying because her social life was simply too stellar? did the fourth wedding invitation overlap with her manicurist's vacation? I hope she doesn't have to do her own nails!
having been curious regarding the edibility of spleen for some time, you can imagine how elated I was when I stumbled across chef fergus henderson's recipe for rolled pig's spleen.
why yes, thanks for noticing everyone, may 2007 did just break into top position with 37 posts.
moss not doing so hot. no evidence of growth. plenty of organic aromas, however. currently the lead suspect for the source of this offensive perfume is the sludge water in the bottom of the moss rock's container. mila just tried to make me clean it out, but I suggested she do it, being the expert horticulturalist. so we are now in a moss standoff. she might think she can outlast me by camping out in her office, but perhaps she does not realize how much internet I can browse in one sitting.
well, back to craigslist. I see some knock-off arco lamps that I shall have to look into. they are quite reasonably priced!
every time I saw her today, she was walking around holding a diet pop. also, she has taken to adding coffeemate (low-fat french vanilla) to her coffee. what next? white sneakers to clinic? cat calendars in her office? humpday celebrations?
I think my ideal career would be reclusive celeb. all the perks of celebrity - living in a hotel, foie burgers every day, johnny depp lending you his island, free manbags, a table at el bulli at the drop of a hat - but none of the constant requirement for impeccable personal hygiene.
google keeps telling me I can make money off my blog by putting some ads in. this is great, because I need an ipod. everyone has one of these except me. I am not 100% certain yet that I would listen to it that much, but I do feel very left out without one.
anyway, this bonus cash works out particularly nicely for me, since by the time that blogging has completely usurped studying in my daily life and I fail out of school by consequence, I will be making so much filthy lucre from google that I will need a new refrigerator just to hold the mind-boggling quantities of foie that will be flowing through EV HQ. who needs school when you are a wealthy blog tycoon?
four seasons, you have really done it this time. while I do confess that "her study" in your west tower residence G looks quite pleasant, what with the sofa and desk and coffee table and occasional chairs strewn about, I was unable to find "his study" anywhere on the floor plan. am I supposed to hang out in the general purpose "library?" or perhaps I will have to spend my evenings in one of the two "galleries?" you are kidding yourself if you think I am going to relax with the latest economist in the rather casual-sounding "family room." and surely you do not expect me to unwind in the "staff lounge."
also it is really nice that "her ensuite" gets a spa tub and a shower and a makeup table and a bidet and a toilet and a spacious vanity, but you seem to have left most of those components out of "his ensuite." in fact, I dare say it is scarcely larger than the powder room next to the walk-in coat closet.
you have got some explaining to do, four seasons.
yahoo says a walk after a heavy meal is good for your heart:
"sir, chef is very excited to fire the next course for you, but you are very welcome to take a stroll in our rooftop garden before we continue. just say the word and I will tell chef to hold your scottish grouse until you return [nothing like a nice game bird to chase the previous course's foie. for the mme, perhaps a squab breast sous-vide]. chef's baby mâche is coming along nicely - he would be most pleased if you gave it a try, I am certain," said my waiter as he signalled for the champagne cart in order to select a vintage for rooftop quaffing.
I am such an advocate for health.
paella I thought you were great but now I realize you are a one dish meal. well that sure is not going to fly so I will find a way to use some more pots, do not worry.
I'll bet you think you are pretty cool karim rashid, with your karimanifesto on your website and your miscellaneous plastic karim shapes instead of words. that makes it really hard to navigate your website you know. also your veuve clicquot chair is the dumbest thing I have seen in a long time. and lose the glasses.
thank you for the outpouring of support everyone. I bought a bag of swedish berries yesterday. and then I stowed them in my belly.
hey meredith grey, here's an idea: why don't you pay a visit to mark sloan and get him to fix that bad case of looking like a forty year old that you seem to have contracted? while you are at it, maybe you could get someone to take a look at that flare-up of please leave the show you are the most annoying person I have ever seen.
p.s. do not worry george, I am sure they just made an adding error or something.
why does no one ever seem to make pork stock? I have a pot of pork water sitting on the stove and I would like to reduce it and make some nice pork demiglace or something.
p.s. pork stock is the new beef stock, you heard it here first.
I think I might grow a moss on a rock. if I see a nice rock by the river on my way home from school tomorrow I will probably take it home with me.
I was thinking about lichen but then I saw a website that said they grow 8 mm a year or something like that. do I look like I am made of time?
p.s. I am not going to lie, I was inspired by an article that said moss is the new grass. this article also said trapezoid was the new square and velcro the new magnet. oh yeah and paper-mache is the new taxidermy.
wow I am actually feeling quite parched. it is probably because of my burn.
also could I have a fresh ice pack please? some morphine would probably be nice too.
I burned my thumb tonight. I was removing some wick ash from a pillar candle with a pair of tweezers, but the candle happened to be on at the time and it kind of heated up my thumb skin a bit too much I guess.
I should certainly hope it goes without saying, but I am going to have to take it easy on the studying for the next while. all that page turning would only exacerbate my injury, I fear.
on the upside, I got out of washing dishes. angered at having to do the dishes twice within a seven day period, however, mila treated me to a constant barrage of heckling while I dried and tidied. it was actually quite exhausting. I hope they never let mila in at yuk-yuks. the poor comedians would never stand a chance with her in the audience.
I watched the garbage men collect the recycling bins from outside our building today. well, recycling men, really. or to be precise, recycling man and standing around man. I would not have been pleased if I were the recycling man, that is for sure.
anyway they came by in their truck today and collected the paper recycling and the plastic/glass recycling. now the problem for these two waste management individuals is that I am wise to their game. I saw them dump both paper and plastic/glass into the same truck. good thing I wasn't reading my school notes!
needless to say, I immediately investigated the situation, and I see two possible explanations: first, it is possible that these men were operating some manner of split-body truck. for instance, Heil Environmental Co. offers its flagship RapidRail truck in a one-pass co-collector model featuring on the fly body compartment selection and improved cordaflex loader harness. but I looked pretty carefully at the truck today, and it did not appear to be a split-body vehicle.
this leaves possible explanation number two: co-mingled collection. by way of example, the city of raleigh, NC sometimes collects multiple waste products simultaneously and then sorts at the depot. raleigh's claims to the contrary, this seems highly innefficient; surely the great municipality of london is one step ahead of raleigh in this regard.
if this second scenario does prove to be the case, perhaps a call is in order to a comptroller or deputy mayor or someone to let them know about recent advances in segregated single-stream trash collection. I could send them Heil's website, which was after all most informative.
incidentally, it was a region of halton truck. the city of london seems to operate its own division of waste management, so I really do not understand why we had a halton truck.
dunhill, your website appears to be having some technical difficulties. that fantastic men's clutch in your lookbook doesn't seem to be showing up in your online store. thought you might like to know. a gratis manclutch for my troubles seems quite reasonable, but some of those sterling pig cuff-links would not go unappreciated either.
I am getting some serious exam-related tmj. big jaw pain. it always seems to happen around exams. exams also tend to derange my snacking patterns. but I cannot decide if it is from eating too many snacks or too few. probably too few. well I guess I will go have a bowl of rice pudding.
I am going to explode I just found monogrammed hangers. CHERRY OR WALNUT HOW WILL I EVER DECIDE?
as we were leaving the house this morning, I asked mila if she even noticed that I was wearing a sweet themed outfit. I am talking dock shoes, button-down white oxford, diagonal stripe rep tie, pincord blazer - and a rather fetching lavender manscarf.
her first thought: "purple?" okay all I had in purple was a manscarf so obviously that was wrong. "nautical?" closer I guess, but still wrong. I was sporting a pretty textbook east coast trad look, so it really should have been pretty obvious. it is a good thing that I appreciate my theme looks, because mila sure does not.
p.s. I forgot a knife today so I am gnawing big hunks of pork tenderloin off my plastic fork. needless to say, this egregious lack of etiquette is ruining my trad look. also it is jerk pork. I wish I had a lobster or some crab cakes or something. I do not feel that they eat jerk on martha's vineyard.
p.p.s. I need some madras trousers.
WOW NEIGHBOURS, I GET IT. YOU HAVE A SUBWOOFER. YOUR STEREO MAKES SO MUCH BASS. YOU LIKE AVRIL LAVIGNE. I GET IT. TURN DOWN YOUR STEREO.
can I have some money please? I really need a polished nickel and lucite butler's table. also I found a monogrammed decanter today. I will probably need one of those when I am older.
p.s. also can I have a plane ticket because they do not sell my lucite tray in canada.
so my blogiversary is coming up soon. may 29th, to be precise. obviously I have noted this event in my agenda. mila, however, is resisting my suggestions to add it to her planner. I do not know why she is so against sharing this special day with me.
david lee, I see that you are so passionate about white asparagus that you will allow no one in your kitchen other than yourself or your sous to peel the albino spears. I like that passion a lot. I see also that you find peeling asparagus very therapeutic, "a good way ... to relieve the stresses of the day." you are such a gentle soul, david lee. if I had to pick a chef named lee to hang out with, it would be you, no contest.
toronto life your new ratings really are bonkers. I am making very little headway in relearning them.
bill clinton your crossword puzzle was okay I guess, but based on will shortz's intro I thought it was going to be a cryptic. please let hillary know that if she ever runs for president your puzzle cost her my vote.
one of my dining heroes recently reported on a dinner that lasted from 7pm until 1am. I counted 16 courses in his photo essay. and there were 6 amuses. jealous.
maybe I will go study now. might be nice to get a couple of lectures in today. or maybe I will just go eat some ice cream and call it a day.
just finished tinkling the ivories. now I need a shower. it was so hot in the den tonight. I am not complaining, I love the heat. I am so glad that it is hot. but it did result in a bit of man glow during some of the more vigorous passages. does that count as a workout? I sweated, so I am thinking it must. I even used the left pedal a few times, so both my legs got some action. it was like a total body workout. I think that earned me a few vanilla wafers, at least.
oh yeah also, the ontario architects awards for 2007 were released april 16. thanks for the heads up, everyone. good thing I didn't run into an architect between then and now, because I would have looked awfully foolish when they asked me what my thoughts were on the 07 winners (180 queen west? KPMB you are fantastic, but that project got my vote for the 2007 puglies. kind of north york chic, you must admit. no offence).
I must recommend the city of toronto archives website. they have thousands of sweet photos from the past 100 or so years. I am talking subways, streets, construction, train tracks, buildings, aerial shots, streetcars, sweet vintage styles, highways, black and white photos, bridges, that sort of thing. please do not visit the website too much though, as it has been kind of sluggish lately.
a few minutes ago, I had never heard of chef kent van dyk. but I just saw his profile on chefdb and suddenly I have an intense urge to attend some catered events. see, chef van dyk apparently runs "trust me catering" in this fair city of london. questionable corporate name aside, this guy has done time at le bernardin, the french laundry, eigensinn farm, susur, and the fat duck. I am getting woozy from all the michelin stars (actual and would-be. and american. SNAP!) flying around in that past sentence. surely there is no chef in london with a more impeccable pedigree than this. I need to find this guy. I WILL EAT YOUR FOOD AND WE CAN CHAT ABOUT ERIC AND THOMAS AND MICHAEL AND HESTON AND WE CAN CRACK JOKES ABOUT SUSUR AND HIS BMW.
with this post marking three centuries of posts, I am also coincidentally almost at a perfect 45,000 words. the internet says 45,000 words is a great length for a novel. so I just need to fill this post and then it will be off to the publishers. publishers of books on paper printing press font ink chapters index table of contents library bookshelf editor dust jacket THE END.
there is a window between my solarium/EV HQ and the den. I do not know why there is an interior window, it is really quite strange. fortunately there is at least a small sliding window, so that if mila is in the living room and I am supposed to be in my office studying, I can close my office door and then climb through the window and escape into the freedom of the rest of the condo.
unfortunately, ever since we moved in this window has been less than sparkling. it has always had a fine layer of window smudge. it is not so bad most of the time, but in the mornings when the sun is shining in you can really see it. I just sit here looking at all the smudges and feeling myself going crazy because I am being beaten by a window. this window has been completely and utterly refractory to any attempts to clean it. I have gone through gallons of windex and litres of vinegar in an attempt to wash off the grime. I have read so many martha stewart articles about how to properly clean a window, but all of her suggestions were powerless against this obstinate interior sheet of glass. I have pumped on spray after spray of windex and let it sit for a couple minutes, to no avail. I have delicately misted the window and then immediately wiped it clean, with equal lack of success. so finally I resorted to a generous wipe-down with palmolive, because it struck me that the pros seemed to use a soapy wash to clean windows, not some namby-pamby spray-on ammonia. MY WINDOW IS SHIMMERING. OR IT WOULD SHIMMER IF I COULD SEE IT. BUT I CAN BARELY SEE IT BECAUSE IT IS SO CLEAN. PALMOLIVE I LOVE YOU.
good weather is clearly here, as the children across the park have decided to hit the pool. unfortunately, with this development comes shrieking and yelling and general clamour. it isn't even that hot out - children, can't you take your unpleasant din inside or something?
in other news, I have finished reading my first lecture so far this term. a few more power study sessions like this, and I will be on my way to a pass for sure.
great, tomorrow is cinco de mayo and our bag of lime tostitos is almost gone. to be honest, I cannot see it making it through the night. perhaps I will heat up some taco shells and eat those instead. too bad mila's germinating avocado tree is not yielding avocados yet, or I could have some guacamole with my taco shells.
anyway, moral of the story here, I was leafing through my new agenda, and there was this page showing all the holidays in countries around the world. my new agenda is a svelte little moleskine number, which I have to say is quite classy. mila made me get it because otherwise I just tried to make her remember my appointments. so far I have not written anything in it for today and onward, so if anyone has any suggestions for something I could put it, I would appreciate it greatly.
so these holidays: canada seems kind of cheap with them. I am seeing holes in february, march, june and august. actually I am pretty sure we have a holiday in august so I do not know what these moleskine people are taking about. it is a good thing I am so taken with the gentle mottled texture of this little book's cover, because otherwise this blatant error would probably give me cause to toss my agenda and return to my attempts to have my schedule maintained by mila.
how could I have forgotten to share: I finally got some manpris on the weekend. they are brown and linen and in general pretty sweet. so I guess it would be okay if it got scorching hot out so I could break them out some time soon. perhaps I will iron them tonight just in case there is a freak heat wave.
run, don't walk, to buy a box of president's choice wheat snax. one of the best new dry carbs I have had the pleasure of tasting in a while. and when I say dry carb I am not kidding around THEY ARE SO DRY. sawdust. delicious sawdust, of course. I am talking rich mahogany or zebrawood or something. and they have the most delightful kick of sweet at the end. fantastic!
