two cookies is never enough

suggested serving sizes are so judgemental.

review: fuji apples

marginally palatable

fair warning

if I see one more mention of "hyper-local" in food & wine I am cancelling my subscription.

pretty much nsfw

hottest thing I have read all week:

"Pour the melted butter over the bowl of butter and stir to melt the butter. The butter should look creamy, with small bits of unmelted butter, and be at room temperature."

that is five butters in two sentences. thomas keller, will you ever cease to amaze?

bad attitude

this may come as a surprise, but sometimes mila gives me attitude. like I am out cruising in my new short pants or something and she is all like "please never wear those again". but do you know what has even more attitude than mila? mila with a leather jacket. for instance, I just got a threatening email because I had not told my blog that mila got a leather jacket. THREATS! also she wonders if she should start hanging out at the biker bar down the street. YOUR JACKET HAS RUFFLES AND A GINGHAM LINING. PLEASE DO NOT HANG OUT WITH THE BIKERS.

or french, I am really not that particular

blog did I tell you that one of my patients was an antique dealer? I asked him to send me a 19th C english writing desk. I do hope he is feeling better, but I cannot also help but to hope that my desk comes soon.

the cast saw is not a toy

you know how there are all those supernanny shows where some british schoolmarm comes in and reforms a bunch of unruly children? do you know who really needs a supernanny? EVERY FAMILY I HAVE SEEN AT THE HOSPITAL IN THE PAST WEEK.

he obviously has not seen the dior homme fall show

I gave a new tailor a try today. I fear he may think I am somewhat crazy, but perhaps I am over-reading the situation:

"so, I need these pants shortened."
"no cuff" he half-asked/half-stated as he pinned my trousers to a standard length.
"yeah, actually I'm going to need a decent cuff on these. and let's shorten them up a touch."
"what? cuff? cuff no good. you get no cuff" he fully stated this time, all the while tweaking the length of the hem slightly.
"yes cuff, please. and way shorter. I need to see ankle bone here."
"what? so short!?" he exclaimed as I pulled the trouser leg up to a flood-ready length. "okay, whatever, I do short, but you are crazy."

stuck at research day

the number of powerpoint slides today is surpassed only by the number of bad suits.

p.s. zzzzzz

OMG RIP

WHEN WAS SOMEONE GOING TO TELL ME THAT METROPOLITAN HOME HAS CEASED PUBLICATION? as usual for these manner of crises, I am left needing larger capital letters to convey my EXTREME DISPLEASURE.

p.s. just finished season one of the wire. mild hangover. nothing that a few episodes from season two can't cure, though.

next time we come I am packing the tizios

our educational pursuits have temporarily brought us to saint john. that is all fine, and I am blending in and starting to talk like the locals (that is not even a joke), but our hospital-provided residence leaves something to be desired. coffee table books are being procured at a furious rate and flowers have been strategically placed, yet the accommodations retain a certain brick-circa-1992 aesthetic. an emergency spiegelau acquisition has improved mealtimes somewhat, and the on-trend felt placemats are similarly doing their best to perk up the surroundings. in the end, however, the castoff hospital furniture simply cannot be overpowered by a superficial fluffing; perhaps I should place a work order for a reupholstering of our couch in a nice barbara barry fabric or some such.

I seriously need to be a waiter

from an instruction manual at a newly opened restaurant in NYC:

"standardize plateau drop technique"

WHAT IS THAT TECHNIQUE? HOW DO I LEARN IT?

asking the tough questions

we are going to a lebanese easter dinner. so I went to the local purveyor of fine wine and asked the clerk what she would recommend for a lebanese easter dinner. the usually knowledgeable merchant stared confusedly at me:

"um... so does that mean spicy?"
"don't know. it will involve ham."
"spicy ham?"

we settled on her favourite merlot and called it a day.

academy ennui

sat through the oscars on sunday. the set was awesome and I really liked how they zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

from an extern at jean georges

via the atlantic: "One recipe I prepped—during the one week when I graduated from peeling vegetables—called for 26 grams of salt. 26. Who am I to judge? Maybe one gram of salt is the difference between three Michelin stars and two." PLEASE SIGN ME UP FOR THAT.

sob story

that new tim hortons commercial with the guy buying winter coats for his immigrating family? maybe I cried a lot when I saw it. and maybe again when I rewatched it on the pvr. and maybe I cried when I saw him buying coats in reverse while it was rewinding. OR MAYBE I DID NOT CRY AT ALL.

thank god for fast forward

what was with the ceremony's ez-listening oh canada? as much as it pains me to say this, why didn't they just send celine her requisite dumptruck of cash and get her to belt it out?

also nice that they got the village people to perform omg I am going to get in so much trouble for that one. seriously though, one guy is wearing a fur vest over what looks distinctly like a waxed chest.

opening ceremony review

why did no one tell me they moved the games from vancouver to podunksville?

THIS JUST IN

BILL CLINTON PLAYS A LOT OF GOLF AND WOULD NOT CUT BACK ON GOLF EVEN THOUGH HE HAD A HEART ATTACK MAYBE HE IS A GOLFAHOLIC. I NEED BIGGER CAPS OMGGGGG must turn off cnn.

what not to say

said stacey: "well I just LOVE that... that... I don't even know what to call it! a shrug?" it is a bolero. "a little wrap?" bolero. "it's like a little cardigan!" bolero. "SHRUGIGAN!"

IT IS A BOLERO. I HATE BOLEROS AND I HATE STACEY LONDON.

gtg. rumour has it that hilary might have dawdled at work before going to visit post-cardiac stent clinton. AND SHE DID NOT EVEN SEEM VERY WORRIED. OMG. BACK TO YOU SANJAY GUPTA TO EXPLAIN WHAT A CARDIAC STENT IS FOR THE ONE MILLIONTH TIME. also can we also please get another talking head in here to tell us about how bill has been in haiti and HAITI IS REALLY EXHAUSTING.