three-star vanity

I am glad that gordon ramsay's magnum opus, "three-star chef," comes with not one, but two ribbon placeholders. the first, perhaps, to mark your favourite picture of gordon (and there are many to choose from: I lost count after fifty or so shots of him fondling meat and caressing artichokes) and the second to save your favourite hyperbolic ramsay quote. I am torn between "three-star cooking is the most dangerous thing I know", set dramatically against a background of well-used pans, and "every filet of beef, every saddle of hare, every basket of truffles is a fight you have to win. you're up against yourself every time," which has been luxuriously typed over a pornographic closeup of what looks like kobe beef. HOW DO YOU FIGHT A BASKET OF TRUFFLES?

p.s. I do note that thomas keller gives ramsay a good run for his money with his melodramatic "respect for food is a respect for life, for what we are and what we do." what does that even mean?

bowing to fashion

I must confess that I am a bit of a fan of the bow tie. so when I am older and am a real doctor, I think I will wear one every seven days or so. obviously I am talking about seven business days, by the way, because if I were on a regular seven day cycle then you would have "bow tie tuesdays" or something and that would look very calculated on my part and obviously I do not want to look calculated. so every week or two I will be rocking a sweet bow tie when I am a grownup. just fyi.

war and art piece

they recently did a bit of a redecorating project on the condo lobby. out with the 80s florals and in with the 90s faux leather. anyway, part of the project involved a couple of objets on a small table. whenever I pass, they are invariably arranged in a most unappealing manner, all rigid and symmetric and simply wrong. so I always take the time to move them into a more pleasing form. yet when I pass through the lobby next, how should I find these little tchotchkes? in their former, ugly state, of course. someone is fighting back! BUT I AM WAGING A SILENT WAR OF ACCESSORIZING AND I SHALL PREVAIL.

try not to be jealous

I got a letter in the mail today from architectural digest, inviting me to subscribe at a preferred, professional rate. PROFESSIONAL RATE. I guess some AD subscription honcho probably saw me out and about one day, and assumed from my dapper appearance that I had the discerning eye and sparkling brain of an architect. SO THEY INVITED ME TO SUBSCRIBE AS A FELLOW PROFESSIONAL. PROFESSIONAL ARCHITECT. actually, now that I think about it, the lady who runs the local framing store wondered if I was an architect (she probably thought my framing decisions had a certain architectural je ne sais quoi about them) so maybe it was she who tipped off the AD honcho.

lab coat conundrum

my residency program is asking for my chest size for the purpose of sizing lab coats. I have an odd-number chest size, though, and the form only has spaces for even numbered measurements. also I am not sure where on the form to indicate my sleeve length or shoulder pitch. wrist circumference? this form is really problematic. I hope halifax has a good tailor.

interview recap

so we just finished residency interviews awhile ago. reflecting back, I realize that my blog did not come up once. why did they never ask me about it? I guess I should have just wedged it into the conversation regardless. really, it is the pefect answer to just about any interview question: greatest strength? my blog. weakness? my blog. proudest moment? my blog. evidence of working well in a team? my blog comments. what motivates you? my blog. describe an ethical dillema? should I blog or study.

really, it is an interview gold mine, this blog. maybe I will get business cards printed with my blog address on them so I can hand them out in future interviews. they would probably just offer me the job on the spot once they found out that I was the genius behind EV.

p.s. I just spelled genius "genious" and the (american) spell checker flagged it, but maybe genious is the canadian spelling? just putting it out there.

p.p.s. I think my second weakness after "my blog" might be "spelling".

95% dry carb

okay thanks everyone for telling me about triscuits sooner. for so many years I have been ignoring them as I browsed the snack cracker aisle, foolishly thinking that they were nothing but the most dry of dry carbs. but then one day at loblaws I remembered that dry carb was in fact my favourite food group, and so promptly threw a box into the cart while mila was distracted by a display of craisins. oh and how dry they are (only 5% moisture according to wikipedia)! yet buttery! I could eat a box in a single sitting, and would, if it were not for mila wandering into the kitchen and catching me with a fistful of crackers after I had already been issued a triscuit moratorium for the day.

boob jobs and lobster!

I mean, paediatric reconstructive hand surgery and well-equipped libraries.

highku

high of sixteen
could it once again be
blazer season

one thumb down

so last week I may or may not have injured my thumb in an incident involving beer bottles. really, who is to say whether or not I then had to go to the emergency room and have my thumb sewn up? and it is certainly possible that when I got home in the early morning I was immediately put on probation by a half-asleep mila. something to do with not being allowed to go out anymore if it meant that I came home with stitches the next day. anyway, obviously I am not admitting to any of this, so when I become famous and reporters are dredging my blog for incriminating nuggets they will come up with little more than empty conjecture. but if the aforementioned were to have taken place, then I suppose it would not be outside the realm of reason to suggest that my thumb might be a little infected right now. I am going to have to keep it on the down-low, though, as I am guessing that thumb infections violate the terms of my probation. perhaps I will have to pay the ER another late night visit to get the problem dealt with after mila goes to bed.