week in review, simon edition

okay so stratford was a bit of a bust. theatre ended up being a family musical and fine dining ended up being suspiciously pink burgers in a hospital backyard. you might think I would like family musicals because I really like music and I guess families are okay. well as a matter of fact I do not like family musicals really that much at all. I really do not feel that I have to explain that one. if I were in english class I would lose a lot of marks for that, but then again if I were in english class I would be more worried about the fact that I cannot really say for certain anymore what a subjunctive is. good thing I am not in english class.

also about fine dining: I love casual bbqs and restaurants that serve mashed potatoes out of a sysco bucket, do not worry I am not a dining snob at all. hope that is cleared up.

because I insist on the highest journalistic standards here I did some sysco googling. I also googled it because I love the internet. sysco, which sells buckets of mashed potatoes and the like, has several lines. for the “Elite of foodservice”, they offer the ‘Supreme’ label. it features an ornate font with extra curls on the S. you can get things like Supreme cheddar cheese product sauce mix. that is just nasty and this is the high end. you then move through ‘Imperial’ (cursive, but no extra swooshes), ‘Classic’ (italics), and ‘Reliance’ (block letters). sysco says that reliance products offer ‘consistence.’ I do not know what consistence tastes like, but my one word review of the reliance line would probably be barf.

looking at pictures of sysco reliance ketchup extra thick, which promises 26% to 28% solids, is really quite exhausting. so I guess that is about all I am going to write about stratford. so much for that thesis statement in paragraph one.

good thing I am not in english class.