body break

for a quick hit of aerobic fitness, why not try some jumping jacks while you microwave some butter flavour popcorn? with 3 1/2 minutes of improved cardiovascular health under your belt, you earned that trans fat.

last minute cramming

ellen video diaries you are so funny. ellen bought a practice podium! now I just hope her next segment is about bipolar disorder. or perhaps psychosis in the elderly. pharmacology?

real original, susur lee

from susur's latest writeup in TOLife:

"dry ice billows from under a pre-desert of lychee sorbet, jamaican sorrel and rhubarb-raspberry jam"

what is this, fat duck circa 2004? dry ice, honestly.

big problems ahead

1) I have clinical methods on st. david's day. I like to wear my green welsh dragon tie on st. david's day, but it is an ironic tie. I cannot very easily show up to the doctor's office in costume, yet I am loathe to forgo the tie as I seem to recall I forgot to wear it last year. perhaps I could wear it under a sweater? I fear that might dilute the effect. wear it over a sweater? might blow the doctor's mind. what to do?

oh yeah also
2) psychiatry exam
3) genitourinary exam

oscar report

tobey maguire please present yourself to the nearest barber for an emergency de-perving.

meryl streep which women's studies professor did you beat up and steal that jewellery from?

philip seymour hoffman maybe try not to fall asleep in a ditch next time before you have to present.

medical school you were just joking when you said there was an exam tomorrow morning, right?

the salesman said it matched my distressed tobacco etagere

from restoration hardware's early spring 2007 catalogue:


"come in, juanita, come in. this is lady who lunches to juanita, please come in. I have no idea how this cleaning business works. I bought this housecleaning apron at restoration hardware but it did not seem to include instructions for use. my potato scrubber keeps leaving streaks on the windows. good thing they included a walkie talkie pouch so I could radio for help. I am in the second floor library, please come immediately! lady who lunches, over and out.

p.s. I already misted the room with my cucumber mint room spray, so you don't have to worry about that."

not a word of the day

postvention

taxman

my sister recently told me about a surgeon in toronto with some very freshly buffed man nails. I wonder if that kind of thing is tax deductible. you know, business expense? all that hand washing dries out the skin, so surely the occasional sports manicure is in order. too bad my barberspa closed. oh well, friday afternoons at stillwater it is. mimosas on the feds!

the fridge stinks

there is so much aroma coming from our fridge right now. even the magnetic seal of the fridge door is powerless to contain the stench. the pungent fumes fill the entire kitchen, let alone the fridge itself, let alone the deli drawer where lives the source of this heady perfume.

you see, this morning, upon finishing my exam, I trekked up to loblaws in order to sate mila's need for bacon. browsing the case of quebec cheeses, as I am wont to do, I saw none other than the 2006 canadian cheese grand prix winner (overall and washed rind), la sauvagine. indeed, if you hurry there may still be a small wedge left.

for those interested, I also procured some bleu benedictin, a quebecois blue apparently made by monks (though I see no mention of cheese making between matins and eucharist. perhaps they do it on their day off). this creamy blue walked away with top honours in the 2000 canadian cheese grand prix, as well as taking the prize for top blue, of course. tasting notes to come. finally, a goat's milk from the makers of la sauvagine - chevre d'art. my experience with this cheese during my lunchtime tasting was less than thrilling, though I will give it another try. I am not optimistic. tellingly, I see no cheese awards on this dud's cv.

kidney kwotes

"interestingly, a minority of cases of membranous nephropathy in adults occur in association with carcinomas"

perhaps by interestingly you mean wow this is boring. time for a carb break.

ontario mulls incandescent bulb ban

okay this is a joke, right? those compact fluorescent bulbs produce an unacceptable light and they are simply too unsightly for exposed uses. dalton, I know that with your point collars and insipid tie knots you do not appreciate the ramifications of this ban, but please reconsider. or perhaps I could apply for some sort of exemption, because I was kind of planning on one of these should I become rich:



that is so hot. I am sorry, government of ontario, do you think that would be nearly as hot with 85 compact fluorescent bulbs? no it would not, it would be an atrocious mess of energy efficiency.

I guess I will just have to start hoarding incandescent bulbs. and then I can cash in on the inevitable black market.

my most luxe experience of the week

earlier this morning I took a few kleenex from their home in the bathroom, and I rested them on the arm of my studying chair in case I needed one later. well fast forward a few minutes, and my kleenex had fallen onto the baseboard heater. fast forward another few minutes: needing a facial tissue, I looked to the arm of my studying chair, where the kleenex no longer were. fortunately I quickly spotted the misplaced tissues on the heater and I immediately applied one to my nose. what pure luxury! oh sinful delight! pleasure of pleasures! if I were a celebrity, let me tell you there would be someone in my entourage charged with maintaining a constant supply of warmed kleenex for me.

call me cicero

I wonder if should start using c with a bar over it instead of a w. I like how the c respects the latin and people will probably think I am some sort of scholar of the antiquities because I am using a c with a bar to mean 'with' and 'with' does not even have a 'c' in it. though I hope it does not seem too affected if I switch abbreviations just so that I seem more academic. I will probably keep the change on the down-low and then people will think that I have always been using the c bar, because that is just what comes naturally to a scholar such as myself.

suddenly it seems to be 9 pm

I hope they ask me about the internet on my exams, because I would ace those questions. maybe some short answer? favourite food blog: discuss. oh I would ace that so much.

1920 smackdown

dear harvey grace,

I really enjoyed your treatise on the organ works of bach (Grace, H. The Organ Works of Bach: The Weimar Period. The Musical Times 61(929):450-3, 1920.). my two favourite passages:

"bach makes such passages almost sufficiently interesting to redeem a branch of art which has been more piteously discredited than any in its whole range, save and except the operatic aria." oh that is so scathing. you just slammed bach and arias at the same time I think.

"but a pedal solo that does not set any loose window-panes rattling is a thing of naught." I hear you, harvey grace. nobody likes an organist cheap with the stops. give us 11, organist. harvey grace said so.

thanks harv, looking forward to reading more of your work in the future,
simon

I am actually studying

I have got to stop reading about tmj disorders. it is giving me some killer jaw pain. also perhaps I will have to return to my orthodontist because I cannot figure out how my bite is supposed to be. I keep trying to distract myself and then suddenly close my teeth together, hoping they will assume their natural position. but then I realize I am testing my bite so I panic at the last moment and everything ends up funny and my jaw still hurts.

the disease of kings

I hope I get gout someday.

341 grams

my lunch tomorrow weighs exactly 341 grams. I know this, because mila arrived as I was in the process of filling tupperwares with our lunches, and she was not confident that I was performing an equitable division of the fried rice. so to appease her, the lunches had to be weighed on our digital scale, and adjusted grain by grain until we had equal lunches.

remarkably, mila raised this equity issue in spite of the fact that she is supposed to be on the "2/3 program." you see, most dinners around here end with mila curled up on the floor complaining that her belly is too full, and to never let her eat so much again. but then the next night she inevitably ends up on the floor in the same fetal position. so she finally decided that, given her diminutive size, she should only take 2/3 as much food as I do. unfortunately, as demonstrated by our lunches, this has not been her most successful resolution to date.

chocolate tasting notes: el rey 'mijao'

with beans from the carenero region on the east coast of venezuela, venezuelan chocolatier el rey has crafted a mild 61% eating chocolate. an attractive, if not mirror-like finish out of the package, this single origin bar breaks open with a subdued crack. released is a robust bouquet of hardwood and vanilla. up front, deep brown notes play against raspberry, fading away into a modest finish of unsalted butter. smooth and fat in the mouth, though with less complexity and character than one expects in a single origin offering. perhaps the bucare, the same bar without the added cocoa butter, will reveal a bit more of these well-pedigreed beans.

cindersimon

an EV reader recently brought it to my attention that the thrilling saga of the front hall mopping was never brought to a conclusion. I probably did not have time to post the conclusion, because I was busy. busy mopping the front hall.