carb log
last night:
20:00h: searched cupboards, found no dry carbs for my consumption. returned to my office crestfallen.
20:15h: tried cupboards again. still no carbs. briefly considered a spoonful of oats. decided against it.
21:00h: no dry carbs mysteriously hiding in fridge.
21:30h: situation dire. feeling faint.
21:50h: briefly considered panfrying a mixture of flour and water. decided against it.
22:10h: flour and milk?
22:30h: wondered if neighbours would loan me a carb?
23:00h: went to bed. carb withdrawal pangs ravaged my body all night.
today:
06:40h: awoke drenched in carb withdrawal sweat.
10:00h: went to tim hortons with doctor. eyed tea biscuits greedily, but no one else got food.
12:10h: ate lunch. no dry carbs.
13:00h: went to tim hortons. tea biscuits depleted. purchased a dutchie.
13:01h: dutchie not satisfying. mila watching, or would have bought a second.
16:30h: obtained recommendation for honey oat pretzel twists
18:00h: ate dinner. still no dry carbs.
19:00h: finally broke. power walked to loblaws.
19:15h: procured pretzel twists and mini ritz with cheese. then went to cookie aisle but was frozen with carb withdrawal paralysis. could not choose cookie. aborted the sweet carb mission and ran to the cash.
19:16h: ripped open bag of pretzel twists and crammed a handful into my salivating mouth.
22:32h: severe carb bloat. supplies of pretzel twists and ritz minis severely depleted.
I will be sure to keep you abreast of any new developments.
9 comments:
i cannot believe you actually went to loblaws...you have a problem.
yeah, it is called fatso.
apparently your problem is emotional abuse from your significant other :-)-rosie
Too funny. I am glad you found the pretzels. Although I have to say I'm not too surprised about your problem, since I have seen you eat an entire restaurant bread basket and still want more dry carbs.
Jess
PS In the spirit of holiday honesty, I think it is time to tell Mila about the incident last week - you know, when I covered for you by shoving your Tim Horton's wrapper evidence under a chair seconds before Mila returned. I think it is time to come clean.
simon!!! don't corrupt jess.
rosie, tell me about it. I have to eat away my misery.
and jess, your spirit of holiday honesty is not entirely welcome here, I must say.
Maybe you just need some oven plywood...
I just realized that if you had written about cars as well as carbs in this entry, the title would have achieved humour on an extra level.
if only I were that witty.
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