cure for suburbia, part two

it looks like stratford might not be panning out exactly as anticipated. but do not worry about simon. I have had a backup plan all along. you may have noticed that stratford was part one of my cure for suburbia. the astute reader may have inferred that there would be, at the very least, a part two to my cure. the less astute reader probably got tired of my incessant drivel a long time ago and left to read people.com.

is there a better antidote for rural than opera and menus gastronomiques? the answer is no, that is actually the best antidote that exists. read on.

the cure for suburbia, part two is, appropriately, a two-pronged attack. it takes place in toronto, after my sojourn in stratford.

prong one: dining. I intend to stuff my face quite full of foie, deconstructed poutine and dim sum. notice my dining covers the spectrum of restaurants from white tablecloth (linen) to white tablecloth (plastic sheet). I am attacking suburbia from every side here. rural isn't going to know what hit it.

prong two: theatre. opera, to be specific. the new opera house in toronto is finally finished. I know this because I go to the construction website every day, and the construction website also sends me a newsletter. I often see the same pictures twice for that reason, but that's okay because I love construction and I love opera, so it works out that way. the COC is having a black tie gala concert to commemorate this opening, culminating in a dinner ON THE STAGE. I am not going to that, but I think that's probably best because I am highly dubious of a meal served on the stage of a theater. what if they give you plastic prop food by mistake? no, I am going to an opening concert that the COC was kind enough to put on for the hoi polloi later in the week. it's going to be a bunch of overplayed arias and ensemble pieces featuring b-list singers. a veritable pavarotti and friends, minus the big names. all the schlock, none of the stars. but that's okay because I'm just throwing down some snob here because that's how I am. I actually think it will be a pretty sweet concert and I am really looking forward to it. I am also really looking forward to seeing the opera house because as you know, I love opera and I love construction.

p.s. if you are even thinking in your head that I am some sort of philistine for writing the hoi polloi above, then the american heritage dictionary thinks you are pedantic. ohhh snap.